Almost Breaking Up Again, So What’s The Point?

I was having a conversation with a friend today about an “almost break up” moment I had with my boyfriend and she said, “Hey! Me too!”.  I inquired what was her reasoning and she explained that it has to do with different communication styles.  Both of our boyfriends are fairly inexperienced with relationships.  She confessed she is inexperienced as well.  And come to think of it, even though I was in a long term relationship at one point… I am also fairly inexperienced.

What have we learned, really?  Unless something forces us to drastically change, we just carry the mistakes of the past into our current relationships and blame it on each other if we call it quits.

The meshing of two people with two completely separate lifestyles is a recipe that needs a LOT of compromising to work.  I don’t know of anyone who likes carrying around compromises in their back pockets.

Sometimes I get caught in the “now”.  Sometimes I am very selfish.  And when that happens I don’t see the whole forest when I am stuck amongst the bristles of a leaf barren tree.  And sometimes HE is too.  No one’s perfect!  Maybe that metaphor was a bit too much.

By being caught in the moment – I amplify the importance of decisions and I amplify my emotional sensitivity to a point where words will hurt (hard).  When things are amplified and urgent, this could create stress and a heavy feeling on everyone involved.

There just needs to be a reminder that hey – I have the rest of my life to figure this out.  What’s the hurry?  If there is a mixture of kindness, patience, and willingness to be emotionally open – really – there is no reason to act with haste.

That is one life lesson I’ve learned (among others) about relationships thus far.  That there is time to learn and grow.  There is time for trust to be built.  There is always time for that proof to bloom in anyone’s perspective of who you are…  You can decide to be urgent if it is biologically healthy for you to do so.  Otherwise, there is always time.

So chill.

Honestly, you can be free and single at any point in life.  Nothing will stop this from happening if you want it to happen.  No marriage certificate, no promise ring, no title… nothing.  So the decision to go back to a status quo might sometimes be what you need.

However – on the other hand… the risk you are taking by having someone in your life to act like your sounding board, to open your eyes on how you are when you are so damn close to another human being (different from family and friends), to give you a healthy reflection of how you really come off… and to care deeply enough to be honest with you about it because there is a vested interest in the betterment of yourself as a person… is worth the whole thing.

All of it.

The entire risk of a relationship.

And that’s the point of a relationship (to me).

So I guess I am pretty damn oblivious to a lot of things.

————————————-

On a separate note, here is a random incomplete poem I wrote purely for entertainment purposes while I was bored at the warehouse:

Plunging, suddenly I am hurling towards

More idle time, racking my brain for more stymie rhymes

Steering my irises through window panes

Letting these surroundings fast forward I will choose

To be fashionably late again

 

I am simply mopping to cope with coming down from

Another adrenaline high

I am also playing pretend to infuse these sometimes provincial moments

With exciting lies

I will act like I am hypnotized

I will fake it till I make it as I compromise

 

Oh don’t bother coming down from your thrones

To join me here weeping

Where I will squeeze tears as a sport because it is better than

Not feeling.

—————–

Because I am feeling silly, asian, and duck-faced:

 



SEO RESULTS IN 17 DAYS FOR YOUSEF ERAKAT aka Fouseytube

So in my last post I spoke about how the keyword phrase “Yousef Erakat Biography” is searched 5,000 times a month but has extremely low competition.

I wrote that post on MARCH 5TH, 2014.

It has been only 17 days.

My blog already is getting visitors from that keyword phrase and is ranked on the 2nd page of google.

THAT’S HOW FAST SEO WORKS WHEN DONE RIGHT.

Yousef Erakat Search

Yes.  I get hits for “Cartoon Finger”.

 

Yousef Erakat Search

Right under IMBD, yo.

But don’t fool yousefs (yourselves).

SEO takes at least 3-4 months to matriculate anywhere for a real business.

This was just a test.  That worked.  If you have any SEO related questions for me please do not hesitate to ask.

Search for “Yousef Erakat biography”.  See me on the 2nd page.  Let’s see what happens a month from now.



My Boyfriend’s Internet Company Email

I got this test email the other day after telling him he needs to have a good welcome email set up once someone signs in and subscribes.

This is what he sent me.

————————————————————————————————

On Wed, Mar 19, 2014 at 7:53 PM, R <> wrote:

Hi Penguin,

I made your profile on CENSORED COMPANY NAME, which you can view here:
http://testotestotheresreallynourl.com

You will be able to access your admin page from the managers cabinet sign in (from the sign in page, click managers cabinet and then enter your login info there), which you can find here:

http://www.CENSOREDCOMPANYNAME.com/manager/sign_in

On the managers sign in page, enter your login credentials:

username: [email protected]
password: peng234

Please enter a detailed profile, with a full menu, and some photos. We find that the more information you provide will  highlight your business better, and it will also make the customer feel more comfortable with choosing your store.

Thank you for joining CENSORED COMPANY NAME!

Your 90-day free trial will end on  March 29th, Latuda!  After the 90 days, if you are happy with our service and do not wish to cancel, your credit card ending in 45penguinbutt67 will be charged $59 on a monthly basis.

Please let me know if you have any questions or need any help setting up your account.

Sincerely,

R
CENSORED COMPANY NAME CEO, Co-Founder
——————————————————————————

Apparently R needs to learn how to call me by my birthright name sometimes.  Because being called an animal can get tiring.  And on top of that, Latuda is a made up word.

 



No One Gets My “Wew”

Maybe it is a mild form of turrets for me, but I say “Wew” all the time to a lot of random people.

It brings me joy to utter that word.

Convo with R:

Me:  I messaged Wew to a whole bunch of people today. No one understands. Except Bob.

R:  And me. I understand. You even have a wew face.

R: My phone now autocorrects to wew.

And that is why R is still on my boyfriend list.

Convo with Bob:

Waking up LATE

Waking up LATE



Who Is Yousef Erakat?

So, who is he?

I was introduced by the video below and I almost DIED.

Them buns are fiiiiioooonnneeee, girl!

Then I went online to google him and there was no real biography page existing anywhere.

So here is your biography.

Name: Yousef Erakat

Age: 24

Height: 5’11

Does he have a girlfriend?: No

School: San Jose State

Race: Palestinian American

Has: Biceps & Triceps

How did it all start?: He was a theatre student and he wrote a business plan and used social media consistently, hustled, and worked hard to provide entertainment via Youtube concentrating on topics such as being Muslim, Terrorism, Racism which led to other skits involving Kidnapping, random pranks, and Drake.  Yeah. Drake.

Subscribers on youtube as of now: 1,446,275.

When did he started getting popular?: 2012

Sources:

Here

Here

His Youtube channel here.

Furthermore…

A lesson in SEO

Take a phrase that is searched a fair amount a month… that has low competition… and write about it.

Let’s see what happens?

2014-03-05_1351

I will show you the before and after traffic.

Stay tuned!



How To Undo Sending An Email In Gmail

Yes, I know you probably have sent one or two emails you regret and you were in Gmail while you were doing it.

Well, I am here to tell you…. you can UNSEND it.  It is a short window of opportunity but better to have a window than to have a closed “You Messed Up, Yo!” door slammed in your face.

1Step One. (Redundant, eh?)  Anyway, Sign into Gmail OBVIOUSLY.

 

 

 

 

2

Click on the icon that looks like a peg at the right hand corner of the screen.  Then left click SETTINGS.

step 1 undo

 

 

 

 

3Then go to the LABS tab –> Within LABS search for “Undo”.

Step 2 Undo

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4Then after that click the radio button “Enable” and click “Save”.

Step 3 Undo

Step 4 Undo

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5

Test it out by sending an email and clicking “undo” at the very top when you don’t mean to send it.

test email

undo button

 

YOU ARE DONE!

It has been awhile since I wrote a “How-To” post instead of ramblings.

Updates:

I might be developing a website creation addiction.

After working with my developers for over a month, my commerce website just launched! Sales (non new website related) are going great and it is now tax time again.  I am currently working to develop two more websites, both of which are totally unrelated in every sense. One is selling one single product (Funded).  One is selling a web service (30K+ project, Funded).  I am also taking an automotive class, exercising every week, and I recently moved to a house with 1 other roommate who looks like he loves health.  I will reveal these websites in due time – probably won’t be for another 6 months or so.

Being so busy makes me horny… all the time.  Does that happen to you?  Then you are all like, “Oh shit…” and you have to plow through the feelings by working harder and ignoring your natural urges?  Like smothering your groin while it is yelling at you, “Pay attention to me!!”

 

 



A Poem About Sex (Must be over 18 to read below)

The other day my email to text conversation with R went like this:
Me: I like to write poems… about sex.
Me: Below is another one I wrote just now because I am horny.  And poetic.

 

The twist and turns, the fabric burns
Of limbs and skin and fluids churn
Out sticky cream; it hurts, it seems
that this pain is what i yearned in dreams.

 

The musk of tuffs, of smothered hair
of smell it permeates our air
It tears, your tongue, my swollen tip
Your grip, I trip, grab both my wrists

 

I’ll scream it out, out loud your name
I’ll whimper softly as I came
Again, once more, this faucet leaks
Eyes rolled, fluttered white to every squeeze

 

Exploding then, both flushed and red
Scratched back, bruised lips, a soiled bed
The cuddling is but only short lived, a Ruse
A simple pause before impending round Two.
————————————————-

R’s response through text:

“I saw your email.
And read your poem.
My big dick and balls.
You’d like to know ’em.”

 

———————————–
Yep.  It’s exactly what you think it is.


What have you learned about life so far

My friend, Hango, AKA, BOB, aka Hangalo, aka Hang… asked me to write a post for her.

Post topic: What are 5 things you have learned about life so far?

It has been a week and I told her I could only think of 1 or 2 or 3-ish at the most.

One is that failure is not the worst thing ever and exploring the weird and the interesting and the strangely taboo… is okay!  That is why I have a therapist.  I have insurance, it affords me a therapist, why not?  Mental health is important just as much as physical health – hence my gym membership.

To keep her identity somewhat private I will name her V.  V told me something very interesting in our last session.  And that is = most working relationships are 50/50.

I was completely oblivious to the fact that having someone pay for you, completely, when you can afford whatever yourself, is …. not right after the dating phase is over.

I shit you not I expected the relationship road ahead of me to be paved by a very nice, cushioned, money-bricked road.

Because I can deliver.  Crazy sex? Check.  A fun experience with another human being? Check. Whatever you want? Maybe check.

Obviously though, after it is no longer just dating and it becomes a relationship, things change.

The concept of paying for a date is still foreign to me.  I know, where have I been living?  Under ex boyfriends who have deluded me into thinking this was okay.  Figuratively, of course!

So the idea of paying… for dates…. is cringeworthy.    My therapist told me healthy and long lasting relationships REQUIRE me to start paying to show appreciation.

I have gotten this far along in my life to not pay during dates.  It’s time to give back?  In a relationship?  If I don’t want my man to feel under-appreciated?  Sure.

Not to say I am not generous.  I am generous in business.  I am generous with random strangers.  The concept of paying for a date does not fit in my paradigm of generosity but THIS IS LIFE!

I can hold my own and have no need for anyone to take care of me.  But what is wrong in wanting it?  Even if I make millions, I still want the guy to pay for everything. EVERYTHING.  I have been schooled that this is the wrong way to go about it.

Ahem.  So that is 1 or 2 life lessons I have learned so far.

Another lesson is….

The more time I have for myself or to be idle, the more I question everything about life.  So it’s best to keep busy and keep productive than to let random questions about life stop me from actually doing life because CONTEMPLATIONS and imaginary conversations are actually nothing when it comes down to it.

And sometimes it can be confused with “planning”, but really, it is just stalling.

If I want to do something, I should just do it.  Pick up a paper, start filling out forms.  Want to exercise?  Join the gym this second (online).  Don’t wait for that Costco discount.  You might go to Costco and decide to buy 10 pies instead of buying the gym membership.  Don’t deliberate.  Life put on pause is not worth it.  You think the outcome will be better if you wait for things to be different before you make the leap?  Unless you need time to save up money for something – it is not worth the wait.

I think these three things should suffice my friend’s bloodthirsty hunger for me to write this post.

You are welcome!

 

 

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